its_not_okay2

 Nothing much has changed.....

I am working at Jimmy Johns, Have been since May of 2010. I love that job. They've trained me as a manager but I do not work as a manager much. But whatever.

I love my beautiful boyfriend Boddray we've been together 3 years this May 5th. Exciting I love him with my entire heart and soul. I know we'll be together forever. We talk about getting married and having a child all the time. Not to mention his whole family LOVES me and they tell him to marry me all the time.

I've got a new addiction. I don't drink anymore, which is the best decision EVER made. Although this new addiction is awesome and it makes me more level headed; when I do not have any it PISSES me off and I feel as though I wanna KILL people. 

The only thing I can say is that I wish I had more money and a better place to live.....




By the way.......ASHLEY CONLEY CAN KISS MY ASS AND FUCKING DIEEEEEE!!!!!!! She's a backstabbing Snitch Bitch!

Today has been a year.
A year of wonderful memories, a year of awesome sex, a year of laughter and a year of amazing love.
I am so happy to be with you Boddray Marshall Willett.
Hopefully we stay together forever.

I love being with Boddray!
There is nothing else I would want more then I want him.
When I am not with him I ach for him.
When I am with him I can not stop smiling.
If I could be the one to choose, I would marry him in a heart beat.
I would even have a family, NOT right away, but later down the road.

The best part is he loves me to.
What more could a girl want?

We hope to stable jobs by next year so we can get our own place.
Or atleast a place not with family members.

Boddray is the one!


I just want to put on here how irratated I get when these young ass people get excited about having a child. WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU!!!!!!!? I just cant believe how people could bring little ones in to this world when they do not have a stable job, a home of their own or a partner to start with. Its just fucking dumb. I mean an adoption agency would not give them a child, for a damn good reason to, so what makes it okay for them to give birth to one. No doubt that some of them would be good parents, but I just cannot help but think how can a 14 to 19 year old be good mothers or fathers. Just fucking use protection unless you are ready to have a child and I mean with all the back-ups to go with it.

People justneed to think.

Arghhhh....

Whatever!

just because you want me to see it and you know that i'd never see it if you talked shit over myspace.

someone once said to me,
"so if you bother wasting your time.....I'm not wasting mine reading it and responsding anymore"

goodcall.
so lets just get on her and talk shit.
makes perfect sense.


im sick of the shit talking.
your a dumb bitch.
keep my name outta your mouth.




this is me getting rid of you.

your no longer part of my life.
and this happened a long time ago.
so i think its about time for you to get rid of me.



sorry monica.
hope your not mad.
i love you.

Now I got a total of 5 tattoos.
I will make it 6 in two weeks.
I am so excited.
I love my beautiful boyfriend so much sometimes!

HELL YEAH BITCHES!

Renee Nick.
A fake image of perfection.
Shut The Fuck Up.
That is what needs to be said to her.
Blame me for your own faluts, Fuck you.
I LOVE how she tells me that she talks shit about me behind my back and then she uses the ezcuse, "I was drunk and angry". Fuck that, why should you be excused for being drunk, it nevered worked for me...Even though I was really being sincere. YOU ARE NO BETTER THEN ANY OF US WHO ARE DRUNK AND SAY AND DO THINGS THAT WE WOULD NEVER REALLY SAY OR DO!
You are not EXCUSED!!!!!

Okay so my life now consist with work and school.
Of course I fucked up so much in school that I now have to wait til April before I can even go back to school...but I guess that is okay with me, atleast I will be going back.

I miss Ashley Conley, Nancy Dungerow, Shannah Lee and Jonathan Putney.

I officially HATE Nick Miller. But for some sad awful reason I still want to be friends with him. I guess I feel a little sad for his sorry excuse of a LIFE. But maybe it is ENVY! That I could not even make it work for 2 weeks.

NEW YEARS EVE is coming up. Excited that I get to get trashed, sad that I get to do it friendless. Do not get me wrong I love my family and I love their pals, but I guess I just wanted some friends to celebrate it with. Also, no boy to enter the New Year with...That is pretty sad. Hopefully I will get up the courage to ask if James wants to come...I think he has a girlfriend but he can bring her as well...I just want some people I know that are not family to come over.

Probation sucks ass. Enough said.



I got to do some community service...or else I might as well say HELLO to 6 more months of this shit. I like going when there are people who go with me. Humane Society is the best place to go.

I MISS GELINA SO MUCH. She should come around more often.



I am hoping to get an apartment SOON! I want to have one in April right before I start school. That would be nice. My own apartment, yay. Kind of lonley, but YAY...a place to say my own. A place to say "Hey, I want to have sex...let's go to my place", a place to say "Hey I want to get drunk , but I have school tomorrow, oh well a few drinks never hurt anyone", a place to finally say "Hey you guys can come over...it will be fine" no matter who they are. Not that I hate living at home, but there are people who are not allowed here and I want them to come over. But I am not miserable, I just want things to look up for me...In the sense that I want a permanant job, I want my own place and most of all I want a boy who likes me for who I am, no matter what I look/act like, no matter any of my imperfections.

I just want to find my soulmate RIGHT NOW! No more dicking around, no more trying out these boys who I "think" are the ones who really care....NO MORE! I just want a boy who loves dancing around stupidly, kissing in public(not making out), cuddling, movies, drinking on occasion, social outings, going out for nice dinners, getting dressed up once in a while, amusements parks, concerts, comedy clubs, dancing clubs, bars, sitting around doing absolutly NOTHING, going to beaches, playing sports for fun, hanging out with close friends, playing board games, laughing, trying new things and many more. I mean I do not expect him to have all these things...and I expect hime to like a few things I might not like. But that is the best thing about a good relationship. Finding out things they like that you NEVER thought you would...and they intrigue you. They make you wanna learn because they are just so DAMN cute when they are trying to explain it.

I am picking...actually I am not. I am just tired. I have dealt with so many DUMBASS guys in my life...I just want them to want me as much as I have always wanted them. Romance it up a little. I do not think I am asking to much. Except love me always and forever and do whatever I say and be prepared for a lot of SEX. Kidding. But not really.

That is it for now...I have to work at the butt ass crack of dawn.


Peace for a while...Unless I feel like I want to vent some more, to absolutly no one who even cares to read this...haha. I am a LOSER.

Fuck everone.....
Im am som drunk.
Fuck you all.
I haw you alll.....
I am anoit thqt drunk.



I mis you baby.